Starting Again....

Well, I see that my last blog entry was April 24. I dropped the ball for a while, but I'm back on track. I'm not going to punish myself, but just move ahead. I've realized that one thing that is hard for me in blogging about this topic is that it is hard for me to concentrate on me. This is not as much about being unselfish as it is about my fear that if my family sees me in weakness, then they will not feel free to come to me for help if they need it. I realize this is irrational thinking as depression is not a sign of weakness. My opinion, in fact, is that depressed people are some of the strongest people alive. They have to be. Correction: WE have to be. See how I excluded myself?
Update on the classical music... I like it!! I truly have developed a taste for it. I do believe it does bring focus to the frontal lobe and a sense of clarity. It sure makes a difference what classical music it is, however. Right now, I'm listening to the music radio found on www.drnedley.com Very nice. AND I also learned from Dr. Nedley's information that humming is valuable to the proper functioning of the frontal lobe. So, I've been humming when I wake up and throughout the day.
Otherwise, still eating almonds, flax seed, tofu, and other wonderful "medicines" that are full of omega-3 and tryptophan. I'm also keeping up with the word games. Exercise is plentiful in my job at the greenhouse this summer, which I am enjoying.

I must say that the digital TV switchover has come at a great time. We tried to make the switchover, but somehow we now have less channels than we did before. We already had no cable or satellite, but could still get a few clear channels. Now, however, we have almost nothing. Which means we are watching very little TV. The reason this works well into my depression recovery journey is that one of the recommendations is to avoid TV. Well, entertainment TV, that is. To the frontal lobe, there is a big difference between entertainment TV and educational or documentary-type TV. The screen switches rapidly with entertainment TV and the brain soon gets sluggish and unable to function with focus. I'm noticing that I don't feel tired as early in the evening, and I do notice more focus. So, whether or not we get the TV fixed, I'll be limiting my viewing and expanding my frontal lobe.

Well, it's 5 a.m. and, as usual, I have been awakened by the heavy and low cloud of depression. A few years ago, I had what doctors call severe depression and what I call "The Great Depression." Since that time, I have had various "recessions." If I stay busy and active, I do well most of the time now. But I do still have episodes, especially first thing in the morning. I'm very weary of it, but God has brought to my mind these words from the Bible in James 5:11
Behold, we count them happy who endure.

Now, as for a couple of things I'm doing from the Nedley plan.....
Classical music. It is highly recommended as a tool in repairing and reviving the frontal lobe of the brain where depression is rearing its ugly head. I have to say that classical music has never drawn me. But I now have my car radio set to it and I am hoping to develop a taste for it. And if I don't develop an actual appetite for it, I will still consider it "medicine" which I'm very grateful for. So, go Bach!!!
I'm also doing more mental exercise, which is recommended. Scrabble is my favorite! Mark, who is not a game person, is kind enough to play with me....and even to beat me once in a while. :-)